discerning the 300 plus plus

not for the faint hearted (ha!).
p/s: to set the mood, please play "Bad day" originally sang by Daniel Powter. The best effect of this blog is better listened to the version by Alvin and the chipmunks. Happy and uplifting.

How does it feel being isolated from the real world, even for a week?
All the familiar flickers of tv, the buzzing of people, the hums of nothingness becomes a terrible alliance of self-thoughts. Even the food mocks and drinks seems to spit at you.

Hishamudin Rais (Abg Sham? wekk) told me his experience being in a jail.
Its not so much of the isolation from the physical world, its the war inside you that burns the most.
Thats what what Kak Lat told us.
The inmates sing the same song albeit different lyrics and tunes.
The inner battle must be conquered, or else the physical kingdom is just a sand castle.

Well heck no, I wasn't thrown into any jail yet.
I can always suggest 'better' persons to go behind the bars (Hah! start with the rebellious Fad, and then the "saya dah berdemo sejak reformasi lagi" Radzlan) Me just a small timer.
Nevertheless.

Try being in a hospital for a week.
So you still get to watch tv, decent food (hospital yuckness), and there's nothing to it compared to being in a jail (except,well, not having internet connection in both places and they smell funny too). I thought well, nothing I'll miss that much (except yming him ~the hospital really should do a wifi hotspot) but I did.
I missed all the things I don't usually do.
And I hate doctors, the remind me (no pun intended) jail directors and them nurses jail wardens.

And I got myself an oath to kiss the ground when I'm released.
How do these people of twenty years of imprisonment keep their sanity???
I myself, for an instance, missed going to work and chasing datelines when I was 'detained'.
How do these people stand twenty effing years, man??

So I'm out here.
I didn't kiss the ground (emotional baggage of a former drama queen) but this time around, I really will eat my quaker oatmeal (swear to God it taste worse than the decent hospital food) every morning, I will really run two miles (thats 4 km plus for you british educated), I reall will skip cold drinks and really will watch my food.

Today, I lost my atm card, keep up the smiley face while the boss strums your patience messaging you for the submissions and some compliance work (oi, I don't do corporate, you get me? and oi, i'm on my not working days lah) all by today.
Coolly I did it all.
And there's nothing to it. The battle has been won.

My castle is not made out of sand.
Finally....
Ahh..

What a appropriate post, with the new gregorian year, to post something positive.
Why, we have extra one day this year 2008, and I suppose we give our best to each and every day God bestowed to us, yes?

Be good to yourselves.
Be kind to others.
Be nice to your friends.
Be there for your loved ones.
Be thankful to God.
Be true to yourself.

I'm grinning from ear to ear.
Tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, and so it continues until the sanctioned day of death, its another 2 miles, another bowl of bluueegh oat, another trip to Sg Buloh with Mak to buy more plants, another wall to paint, another futsal to play (yeah Atie!! see you people this Sunday (especially my dearest confidante, MM who came back from Germany),
another chance of life; to love, to build, to appreciate, to accomplish, to discern!,
another day out of the 366 days to live life to the fullest.

Until death comes to take us away to Him.


p/s:
for those missing my posts for almost a week now, the mac's back.
I'm feeling so much better now.
oh ye. The Federal Counsel of law20 just officiated Law20 blog.

You people who call yourselves law20/blogger, please rant there.