Thursday, February 12, 2009

retour a vega

Woke up at ten.
Called in the office to say I'll be coming late. Got home late last night from a funeral.


My mind had been travelling at the speed of light nowadays and now for a pit stop in Montreal.
Not Montauk, but oh well, still, its a long way from home.

*That's it, here I go again, I'm dividing into two
I'm both the actor and the scenery
Don't know where I go, where I go should I know?
I go nowhere but I go at full speed
The breath of the trucks, the alienating sun
On the roof of the Brancroft Building at Montreal..


Was thinking about a friend, who had just lost her mother last night.
She needs all the strength she can gather, the loss of a mother is extremely painful.
Can't imagine myself in her shoes, and no comforting words can be right enough.
I just didn't know what to say.

And I thought of another friend who resorted her ways into drinking.
She texted me to say now she knows why people drink, and she would've done it earlier if she knew the alcohol would take her pain away. Albeit temporary.
And drink she did all night long.

I feel frustrated. Bodoh.
You can't runaway and hide yourself against the opaque glass of JDs, you know that.
I can't save you, if you don't want to be rescued.

oh yes, MBE. Another french song for you.
Sometimes, when you don't understand completely something, you'll feel more connected. Hiding in the shadows of abstracity, the foreign sounding words, everything alien that comforts.

It is where won't see unison of things, or the absence of familiarity, where all you want is a place to belong. That's why we always want to be different from the others.




*Ca y'est c'est reparti je me divise en deux
Je suis toute a la fois l'acteur et le décor
Je ne sais ou je vais ou jamais le saurais-je
Je ne vais nulle part mais a toute de vitesse
L'haleine des camions le soleil alienant
Sur le toit du Bancroft building a Montreal

4 comments:

midnight blue eyed 12 February 2009 at 16:00:00 GMT+8  

haha yup i agree..we try to relate ourselves to this world by trying to be something different.irony of life.
what we call an identity.

mr K 12 February 2009 at 18:24:00 GMT+8  

takziah utk lily's mom.

même vous ne voulez pas être sauvé, I est toujours là pour vous cher.

AALAA' 16 February 2009 at 15:23:00 GMT+8  

kak af! just read this post of urs. (mcm bese lah kan lambat). takziah to ur fren, u know wat, my fren also lost her mother yesterday, well to be exact, around 230am sunday. sedih sgt kan.. i too can never imagined to be in their shoes..

Amicus Curiae 17 February 2009 at 14:20:00 GMT+8  

mothers.sigh.

nothing quite like losing them.

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