why oh why

Borrowing the quote from the suddenly famous sharifah amani " I feel stupid when I ______" (fill in the blanks).
Mine would be: I feel stupid when I can't explain my reasons. When I can't defend myself.

Haiyok. So defensive meh?

I'm sure khalil gibran said something about when you're strong, you don't need to defend yourself, its when you're weak you became defensive.

I'm a practical idealistic idiot who rather thinks that every action should be calculated.
So when I deleted the old blod to be replaced with this cold-blooded blog, please be rest assured that I'm not suffering post-natal syndromes or maniacal sickness or simply put became so forgetful that i pressed the DELETE BLOG button.

I did it on my own free (might even be half-calculated) will.
I felt like I didn't belong, trying to please certain audiences when I am deeply sure that I rather write something else.

So ladies and gentlemen, and children of all ages, welcome to my show.
Nooooooo I'm not gonna give you people any tiltilating blogs you idiots, but rather towards a personal blog, than trying to become the next BBC spokeperson (not that I succeeded.Damn. But anyway) So yeah. Here you go. Boo hoo. Clap clap clap.

Told ya I didn't read law to become stupid, but if there's anything in the world to know this,you'll be comforted, tout par raison everything has its own reason. So hence it explains~ that you would not put at fault if you have reasons. Okay, okay. Good reasons. But still. MgNaghten rules people. Put on your defense mechanism (mine would be: acting blur "say, were you tellin me something? eh how come your face is red?")

Not trying to be defensive, or to imply my weaknesses (bet we all embrace our own) but really I'm trying to save my ass from explaining numerous times to friends to their wraths why did you delete your bloody blog just to restart new i had just deleted the link to your bloody blog yada yada yada.

Thats its. I just wanted to start fresh anew.