that's it

I've had enough.

Last few weeks I had been dwindling my head, trying to make a reasoned decision.
To go or not to go.
To litigate or to arbitrate.
To do general or go specialize.

It was 50-50. Good and bad in every thing.
But, I thought, hey since I knew to what extend the bad can be if I stay, so I'll stay.
I'm in my comfort zone.
If not for the "happenings" I would've have considered at all.

Friends told me I was lucky to have a boss who trust me with his business.
But I told them, it is me thrown into a deep end.
And it is I who longed for a mentor.

Some say its best to learn at your own pace, every mistake becomes your eventual armour.
If there's anything I should say, the first years of practice taught you really how to thicken your face, getting screamed by the judges and looked down by your senior peers.
But in the end, its the strength you built that counts.
Its the skill you can never achieve just by reading books.

But still, I miss having someone to guide.
Most of the time, it is me having to pakai hentam everything.

So there.
There's good, there's bad.

I've to admit I wouldn't consider leaving at all if what happened yesterday didn't happen.
I feel so bad.
I feel so bad.
I feel so bad.
It just won't do if I stay.

I'm leaving, to join an arbitration firm.
I'll sure miss going to court, but hey..there will always be Legal Aid.

Guess I won't be doing what i used to do.
Including having a nicer boss.

In two months, that is.
Seems this decision, is guided by fate.
Biiznillah.


p/s:
Can't sleep.
Insomniac for witnessing a friend's arrest.
Anyway, tomorrow I'm heading south. A break from all this awful memories.

Oh ya.
Happy 19th birthday to my kid brother, Fariz Danial.
You're getting taller (reaching 5' 11" now), smarter and sweeter.
Please don't break any girl's heart.
Hahaha.